"Callousness and insolence bring to bare unanimous social condemnation, while the simple efforts of politeness are admired; even in those who are otherwise despised"

Cruelty and swaggering disrespect provoke a rare social consensus: people recoil. Communities can tolerate differences in taste, belief, or competence, but indifference to others’ feelings and open contempt signal a threat to basic cooperation. Such behavior violates the minimum covenant that allows strangers to share space, recognition of mutual dignity. When that covenant is broken, condemnation functions as a protective reflex, reaffirming norms that keep daily life livable. The judgment arrives not only from moralists but from pragmatists who know that callousness invites instability and unnecessary conflict. Even the powerful lose standing when they dismiss ordinary courtesy, because audiences instinctively gauge character by how one treats those with less leverage.

By contrast, small gestures of politeness punch far above their weight. A ready please, a patient tone, the habit of listening, these cost almost nothing yet signal self-mastery and regard for others. People admire such gestures even in adversaries, not because they forget deeper faults, but because civility is a public good. Politeness lowers transaction costs, smooths negotiations, and allows disagreement without humiliation. It offers a shared language when interests diverge and tempers rise. This admiration is often grudging, but it is real: we may distrust someone’s motives while still acknowledging the discipline and respect communicated by their manners. That distinction keeps room for coexistence and, sometimes, reform.

The line also implies a practical ethic: if one cannot yet be kind, be courteous; if one cannot yet agree, be respectful. Social life is a dense web of low-stakes encounters whose cumulative tone shapes trust. Harshness corrodes that trust faster than brilliance can restore it, while modest civility rebuilds it faster than grand speeches can. People remember how you made them feel, and they credit even small efforts to make shared space safer and more human.