"At the bottom of enmity between strangers lies indifference"

Søren Kierkegaard’s assertion that “At the bottom of enmity between strangers lies indifference” offers a profound psychological and existential insight into human relationships. When strangers harbor enmity, their hostility is not fueled by any deep emotional connection, shared history, or personal investment; instead, it rests upon a foundation of indifference. Strangers lack mutual bonds, understanding, or affection, and their antagonism can be seen as superficial, almost arbitrary, because at their core, each person is essentially unconcerned with the other’s true existence, values, or qualities.

Indifference signifies a lack of recognition of the other’s humanity, a disengagement from who they are as individuals. Enmity in this context is not a true engagement but an absence of real connection; it is easier to despise or antagonize someone you have never known because their distress, beliefs, or joys do not touch you. The feelings one holds toward a stranger are impersonal, unmoved, governed by stereotypes, fear of the unknown, or social constructs rather than genuine animosity. Hatred between strangers thus becomes a byproduct of not caring, of failing to see the other as fully human or worthy of empathy.

In deeper relationships, between friends, lovers, or family, enmity is often mingled with pain, disappointment, and the memory of connection, making it passionate and deeply felt. But when it comes to strangers, hostility is hollow, undergirded by a void rather than engagement. This suggests that true reconciliation, understanding, or even meaningful conflict requires something more than mere opposition; it demands a willingness to see and engage with the other. Kierkegaard’s observation challenges us to recognize how easily indifference breeds hostility in unfamiliar social spheres, and to strive instead for curiosity, empathy, and the dangerous intimacy of honest engagement. Only then can the shallow enmity of strangers give way to genuine understanding.