"One of the many lessons that one learns in prison is, that things are what they are and will be what they will be"

Oscar Wilde’s reflection, earned through the harsh crucible of imprisonment, carries a quietly potent wisdom. Detached from illusions and expectations, Wilde observes that reality possesses a stubborn persistence, independent of human desires. While imprisonment strips a person of control, removing choice, variety, and agency, Wilde sees within that confinement a lesson that transcends those physical barriers. Things are as they present themselves, and the future unfolds on its own terms, indifferent to longing, protest, or denial.

Living day after day within strict, unbendable rules, watching time crawl by with relentless sameness, Wilde is forced to acknowledge the futility of resistance to certain realities. Coping with suffering or disappointment becomes less about changing external circumstances and more about accepting them. This acceptance is not the same as resignation, nor is it apathy. Rather, it is a reckoning with the limits of power and a turn toward fortitude. While outside of prison one might distract oneself with hopes, ambitions, or the belief in one’s own ability to shape outcomes, in prison those distractions are stripped away, revealing a raw and primal existence. The lesson is distilled: attempting to argue with reality only produces sorrow.

Beneath Wilde’s words lingers an invitation to cultivate equanimity. Whether confined literally or metaphorically, humans face many circumstances that are simply outside their control. Clinging to how things “should” be only heightens suffering; discovering peace in the acceptance of “what is,” however grim, can become a paradoxical relief. The future, equally untamed, will arrive in its own way and time. Instead of wrestling with inevitability, one can nurture patience and clarity. Wilde’s insight, born from the stark clarity of suffering, encourages surrender not to despair but to the humble understanding that acceptance can be a path to endurance and, perhaps, a quiet sort of freedom.