"People think love is an emotion. Love is good sense"

Love is often described as an uncontrollable feeling, a surge of passion, or a sweeping emotion that overtakes logic. Yet, Ken Kesey challenges this prevailing belief with keen insight, positing that love resides less in the heart’s flutters and more in rational wisdom. By suggesting that love is “good sense,” Kesey redefines the emotion as a conscious, deliberate choice, anchored in discernment and maturity rather than the unpredictable tides of feeling.

Such a perspective implies that real love thrives not because of intense attraction or euphoria, but because of thoughtful understanding and care. When relationships endure hardship, it isn’t the power of fleeting emotion that carries partners through, but the strength of decisions rooted in patience, empathy, and commitment. Emotions can be fleeting, often influenced by circumstance or mood, but good sense provides a foundation, the kind of clear-sightedness that allows a person to see value in another even during conflicts, disappointments, or the mundane routines of daily life.

Love as good sense also recognizes the importance of self-awareness and mutual respect. It’s about knowing what is truly best for oneself and for another, rather than surrendering to impulsive desires or romanticized ideals. In practice, this means setting healthy boundaries, offering forgiveness, and choosing, again and again, to nurture the relationship in realistic, enduring ways. By grounding love in sense, Kesey transforms it from an ephemeral emotional cloud into an act of will, responsibility, and conscious intention.

Kesey’s assertion doesn’t reject the emotional aspects of love, but rather elevates the intellect as its true steward. Passion may ignite a connection, but it’s good sense, manifested as kindness, reliability, and understanding, that sustains and matures it. True love, then, is not just how one feels, but how one chooses to act and persist day by day.