"Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat"
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Oscar Wilde’s epigram about women and men, “Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat,” deftly encapsulates the complex interplay of flirtation, pursuit, and commitment within romantic relationships. Wilde employs irony and wit to highlight a paradox often present in courtship. The first part, “resisting a man's advances,” touches upon traditional dynamics where women, due to societal norms or personal inclination, may initially appear reluctant or coy in the face of romantic interest. This phase can reflect a mixture of modesty, societal expectation, or a means of ascertaining a suitor’s seriousness and worthiness.
The phrase also plays with the idea of pursuit as an essential catalyst in romantic relations, with resistance serving as both a protective gesture and an invitation to genuine effort from the suitor. This resistance, rather than outright rejection, can intensify desire and lend intrigue to the early stages of romance.
However, Wilde then pivots to a reversal in the second half: “and ends by blocking his retreat.” Here, he alludes to a shift in power once the woman reciprocates affection or accepts the man's pursuit. At this point, the woman, having chosen, may seek to cement the bond and ensure continuity, sometimes by holding the man to his earlier passion and promises. In doing so, she may metaphorically, or even literally, make it difficult for him to withdraw, suggesting a possessiveness or desire for commitment and permanence.
Wilde’s statement thus satirizes human relationships, suggesting that what begins as delicate resistance can conclude in tenacious attachment. It pokes fun at stereotypes of both genders: men as persistent hunters soon eager to retreat, and women as gatekeepers who, having finally opened the gates, become defenders of the new union. The quote’s enduring resonance springs from its playful yet pointed commentary on the ever-evolving negotiations of attraction and love.
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