Book: Necessary Losses

Intro
" Necessary Losses" is a remarkable book written by Judith Viorst in 1986 which explores the idea of loss and how it shapes our lives. The author, a renowned psychologist and writer, uses an insightful perspective on human development through the lens of losses that we all should deal with in order to evolve, grow and obtain individual fulfillment.

The Concept of Loss
The foundation of Viorst's work depends on her understanding of loss as an integral and inevitable part of the human experience. In "Necessary Losses", she argues that the losses we experience throughout our lives ultimately culminate in our development, modification, and advancement.

These losses can be either physical, such as losing an enjoyed one, or emotional, such as ending a substantial relationship or abandoning a long-held hope. By analyzing these different kinds of loss, Viorst advises us to accept them as unavoidable elements of life that we should learn to accept and move through with grace and versatility.

Developmental Stages and Losses
Viorst posits that people go through stages of emotional development throughout their lives, each defined by specific losses that are deemed essential for growth. She lays out 4 primary stages, that include:

1. Infancy and Early Childhood: In this stage, we experience the loss of absolute security and defense as we leave our mom's womb and go into the world. We should likewise slowly let go of the belief that the world revolves around us and accept that others have their own desires, needs, and feelings.

2. Adolescence: As we come of age, we must face the loss of childhood innocence and welcome our developing sense of identity. We must also find out to navigate the world of peer relationships, accept our establishing sexuality, and prepare to leave our adult house.

3. Adulthood: As we establish ourselves as different people, we encounter the loss of old relationships and form new ones. Additionally, we should release impractical dreams, confront our business and profession challenges, and accept our duties as parents.

4. Later on Life: In our final stage of life, we need to find out to handle the loss of youth and vigor. Ultimately, we should confront our death, redefine our purpose and significance, and prepare to say goodbye to liked ones we leave.

Having and Losing Love
At the heart of Viorst's philosophy is the concept that our relationships are main to our psychological well-being. Throughout "Necessary Losses", she takes a look at the various types of relationships we form in our lives, consisting of friendships, romantic collaborations, and parental bonds. In every meaningful relationship, there is an inherent threat of loss, whether through death, divorce, or just growing apart.

Viorst maintains that it is just through accepting this fundamental vulnerability that we can find out to value the value of these relationships and end up being more proficient at dealing with loss. As we mature, we should let go of our attachment to old relationships and develop the emotional resiliency necessary to enable us to love deeply and without fear.

Conclusion
"Necessary Losses" is a powerful exploration of the human experience through the lens of loss and sorrow. Judith Viorst's compassionate and insightful examination of how these universal experiences form our lives offers readers a thoughtful and practical guide to accepting, understanding, and moving through life's inevitable losses.

The book eventually functions as an affirmation of the value of strength and approval in promoting psychological well-being and individual growth. By welcoming the necessary losses we experience throughout our lives, we are much better equipped to face our own mortality and approach the world with wisdom, empathy, and understanding.