W. C. Fields was a famous Comedian from USA, who lived between January 29, 1880 and December 25, 1946. He/she became 66 years old.
Zodiac:
He/she is born under the zodiac aquarius, who is known for Knowledge, Humanitarian, Serious, Insightful, Duplicitous.
Our collection contains 52 quotes who is written / told by C. Fields, under the main topics: Success - Politics - Equality.
52 Famous quotes by W. C. Fields
"Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad"
"Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream"
"Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed"
"I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food"
"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people"
"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull"
"I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison"
"I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy"
"Here lies W. C. Fields. I would rather be living in Philadelphia"
"Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against"
"Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?"
"Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live"
"Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again"
"Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned"
"I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally"
"The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive"
"The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart"
"Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it"
"There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it"
"Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch"
"The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves"
"Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake"
"All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women"
"Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler"
"Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket"
"A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her"
"A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money"
"You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it"
"Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want to own one"
"When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty"
"Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink"
"Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil"
"Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch"
"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water"
"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water"
"On the whole, I'd rather be in Philidelphia"
"Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times"
"No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree"
"Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life"
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it"
"I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally"
"I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday"
"I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being driven home"
"I never vote for anyone. I always vote against"
"I never met a kid I liked"
"I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming"
"I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes"
"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it"
"I must have a drink of breakfast"
"I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy"
