Dad Quotes

Welcome to Typical Dad Quotes, the utmost source for all the best dad jokes, one-liners, as well as puns! Whether you're seeking a laugh or just need a pick-me-up, you'll discover it here. Our collection of dad quotes makes certain to bring a smile to your face as well as a chuckle to your heart. From the classic dad jokes to the much more modern dad humor, we've got it all. So, take a look around as well as appreciate the laughs!
Small: Father told me that if I ever met a lady in a dress like yours, I must look her straight in the eyes
Prince Charles
"Father told me that if I ever met a lady in a dress like yours, I must look her straight in the eyes"
Prince Charles, Royalty
Small: My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it
"My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it"
Victor Borge, Musician
Small: I stopped loving my father a long time ago. What remained was the slavery to a pattern
"I stopped loving my father a long time ago. What remained was the slavery to a pattern"
Anais Nin, Author
Small: An angry father is most cruel towards himself
Publilius Syrus
"An angry father is most cruel towards himself"
Publilius Syrus, Poet
Small: All the learnin my father paid for was a bit o birch at one end and an alphabet at the other
George Eliot
"All the learnin' my father paid for was a bit o' birch at one end and an alphabet at the other"
George Eliot, Author
Small: Every parent is at some time the father of the unreturned prodigal, with nothing to do but keep his house open
John Ciardi
"Every parent is at some time the father of the unreturned prodigal, with nothing to do but keep his house open to hope"
John Ciardi, Dramatist
Small: Fathers are biological necessities, but social accidents
"Fathers are biological necessities, but social accidents"
Margaret Mead, Scientist
Small: I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out
"I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out"
Jay London, Comedian
Small: The time not to become a father is eighteen years before a war
E. B. White
"The time not to become a father is eighteen years before a war"
E. B. White, Writer
Small: Undeservedly you will atone for the sins of your fathers
Horace
"Undeservedly you will atone for the sins of your fathers"
Horace, Poet
Small: A dramatic thing, the first time you stand up to your dad
Lenny Kravitz
"A dramatic thing, the first time you stand up to your dad"
Lenny Kravitz, Musician
Small: It is impossible to please all the world and ones father
Jean de La Fontaine
"It is impossible to please all the world and one's father"
Jean de La Fontaine, Poet
Small: My father, he was like the rock, the guy you went to with every problem
"My father, he was like the rock, the guy you went to with every problem"
Gwyneth Paltrow, Actress
Small: Thirteen, 13 children, and I love - I love them all. And I think Ive been a good father to all of them
"Thirteen, 13 children, and I love - I love them all. And I think I've been a good father to all of them"
Anthony Quinn, Actor
Small: Employee fathers need to step up to the plate and put their family needs on the table
James Levine
"Employee fathers need to step up to the plate and put their family needs on the table"
James Levine, Musician
Small: To be as good as our fathers we must be better, imitation is not discipleship
"To be as good as our fathers we must be better, imitation is not discipleship"
Wendell Phillips, Activist
Small: I pressed my fathers hand and told him I would protect his grave with my life. My father smiled and passed awa
"I pressed my father's hand and told him I would protect his grave with my life. My father smiled and passed away to the spirit land"
Chief Joseph, Leader
Small: But the love of adventure was in fathers blood
Buffalo Bill
"But the love of adventure was in father's blood"
Buffalo Bill, Celebrity
Small: Theres sometimes a weird benefit to having an alcoholic, violent father. He really motivated me in that I neve
"There's sometimes a weird benefit to having an alcoholic, violent father. He really motivated me in that I never wanted to be anything like him"
Dean Koontz, Author
Small: I wanted to be a forest ranger or a coal man. At a very early age, I knew I didnt want to do what my dad did,
"I wanted to be a forest ranger or a coal man. At a very early age, I knew I didn't want to do what my dad did, which was work in an office"
Harrison Ford, Actor
Small: It was my father who taught me to value myself. He told me that I was uncommonly beautiful and that I was the
"It was my father who taught me to value myself. He told me that I was uncommonly beautiful and that I was the most precious thing in his life"
Dawn French, Comedian
Small: I love the comic opportunities that come up in the context of a father-son relationship
"I love the comic opportunities that come up in the context of a father-son relationship"
Harrison Ford, Actor
Small: Being a father helps me be more responsible... you see more things than youve ever seen
"Being a father helps me be more responsible... you see more things than you've ever seen"
Kid Rock, Musician
Small: My father? I never knew him. Never even seen a picture of him
"My father? I never knew him. Never even seen a picture of him"
Eminem, Musician
Small: My grandfather, along with Carnegie, was a pioneer in philanthropy, which my father then practiced on a very l
"My grandfather, along with Carnegie, was a pioneer in philanthropy, which my father then practiced on a very large scale"
David Rockefeller, Businessman
Small: My father was the most rational and the most dispassionate of men
"My father was the most rational and the most dispassionate of men"
Simon Newcomb, Mathematician
Small: Feels good to try, but playing a father, Im getting a little older. I see now that Im taking it more serious a
"Feels good to try, but playing a father, I'm getting a little older. I see now that I'm taking it more serious and I do want that lifestyle"
Adam Sandler, Actor
Small: My father loved people, children and pets
Tony Visconti
"My father loved people, children and pets"
Tony Visconti, Musician
Small: A fathers disappointment can be a very powerful tool
"A father's disappointment can be a very powerful tool"
Michael Bergin, Actor
Small: My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him
"My father and I have a very good relationship. We always got along. But I always scold him"
Amy Sedaris, Actress
Small: I never had a speech from my father this is what you must do or shouldnt do but I just learned to be led by ex
"I never had a speech from my father 'this is what you must do or shouldn't do' but I just learned to be led by example. My father wasn't perfect"
Adam Sandler, Actor
Small: A man knows when he is growing old because he begins to look like his father
"A man knows when he is growing old because he begins to look like his father"
Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Novelist
Small: As a little girl I used to daydream about my real father coming on a white horse to rescue me
"As a little girl I used to daydream about my real father coming on a white horse to rescue me"
Christine Keeler, Model
Small: My dad always said, Dont worry what people think, because you cant change it.
Daisy Donovan
"My dad always said, 'Don't worry what people think, because you can't change it.'"
Daisy Donovan, Actress
Small: Being a father to my family and a husband is to me much more important than what I did in the business
"Being a father to my family and a husband is to me much more important than what I did in the business"
Tom Bosley, Actor
Small: But I have to be careful not to let the world dazzle me so much that I forget that Im a husband and a father
Herbie Hancock
"But I have to be careful not to let the world dazzle me so much that I forget that I'm a husband and a father"
Herbie Hancock, Musician
Small: No, I never thought about my fathers money as my money
"No, I never thought about my father's money as my money"
Christie Hefner, Businessman
Small: Babies dont need fathers, but mothers do. Someone who is taking care of a baby needs to be taken care of
"Babies don't need fathers, but mothers do. Someone who is taking care of a baby needs to be taken care of"
Amy Heckerling, Director
Small: Father or stepfather - those are just titles to me. They dont mean anything
Oliver Hudson
"Father or stepfather - those are just titles to me. They don't mean anything"
Oliver Hudson, Actor
Small: Dad was the only adult male I ever trusted
Michael Reagan
"Dad was the only adult male I ever trusted"
Michael Reagan, Radio host
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