"Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship"
About this Quote
The intent is less to define love than to reroute it. Instead of passion or compatibility, he plants the flag on conflict management. "Work out their conflicts" treats intimacy like a practice, not a destiny - two people choosing the hard, unglamorous labor of staying in the room. The subtext is that conflict isn't a threat to love; it's the raw material. Commitment becomes the only believable romance because it survives contact with reality.
Context matters: Shandling's comedy, especially in The Larry Sanders Show, was obsessed with how people perform themselves and how relationships warp under ego, insecurity, and showbiz pressures. Against that backdrop, his definition of love as mutual growth reads like a hard-won concession, not a naive belief. It's also a quiet rebuke to the modern fetish for "no drama" partnerships: he assumes drama is inevitable, and he prizes the couple that can metabolize it into development. Love, for Shandling, isn't the absence of problems; it's the decision to keep becoming, together, anyway.
Quote Details
| Topic | Relationship |
|---|---|
| Source | Help us find the source |
| Cite |
Citation Formats
APA Style (7th ed.)
Shandling, Garry. (2026, January 16). Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship. FixQuotes. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/which-is-im-an-optimist-that-two-people-can-be-125815/
Chicago Style
Shandling, Garry. "Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship." FixQuotes. January 16, 2026. https://fixquotes.com/quotes/which-is-im-an-optimist-that-two-people-can-be-125815/.
MLA Style (9th ed.)
"Which is, I'm an optimist that two people can be together to work out their conflicts. And that commitment, I think, might be what love is, because they both grow from their relationship." FixQuotes, 16 Jan. 2026, https://fixquotes.com/quotes/which-is-im-an-optimist-that-two-people-can-be-125815/. Accessed 11 Feb. 2026.















