Facts about Fred Allen

Occup.Comedian
FromUSA
BornMay 31, 1894
DiedMarch 17, 1956
Aged61 years

Summary

Fred Allen was a famous Comedian from USA, who lived between May 31, 1894 and March 17, 1956. He/she became 61 years old.

Zodiac:
He/she is born under the zodiac gemini, who is known for Communication, Indecision, Inquisitive, Intelligent, Changeable. Our collection contains 46 quotes who is written / told by Fred, under the main topics: Business - Funny - Humor - Graduation.

46 Famous quotes by Fred Allen

Small: The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their religion
"The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion"
Small: Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange
"Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you"
Small: It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances
"It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals"
Small: Imitation is the sincerest form of television
"Imitation is the sincerest form of television"
Small: Id rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy
"I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy"
Small: I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement
"I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement"
Small: An actors popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to lo
"An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match"
Small: California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange
"California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange"
Small: Radio is a bag of mediocrity where little men with carbon minds wallow in sluice of their own making
"Radio is a bag of mediocrity where little men with carbon minds wallow in sluice of their own making"
Small: The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed
"The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed"
Small: I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I cant remember what the third thin
"I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what the third thing is"
Small: Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent
"Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent"
Small: A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better
"A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better"
Small: I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back
"I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back"
Small: All I know about humor is that I dont know anything about it
"All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it"
Small: An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission
"An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission"
Small: Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners
"Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners"
Small: The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has
"The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference"
Small: I dont want to own anything that wont fit into my coffin
"I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin"
Small: You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room e
"You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart"
Small: Television is the triumph of machine over people
"Television is the triumph of machine over people"
Small: Television is a medium because anything well done is rare
"Television is a medium because anything well done is rare"
Small: I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me
"I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me"
Small: During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk today we have small men enjoying bi
"During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk"
Small: A gentleman is any man who wouldnt hit a woman with his hat on
"A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on"
Small: We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supp
"We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion"
Small: The last time I saw him he was walking down lovers lane holding his own hand
"The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand"
Small: The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi
"The first thing that strikes a visitor to Paris is a taxi"
Small: If I could get my membership fee back, Id resign from the human race
"If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race"
Small: I dont have to look up my family tree, because I know that Im the sap
"I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap"
Small: An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt
"An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt"
Small: A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary
"A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary"
Small: Whats on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement
"What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement"
Small: Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. Theyre afraid God might recognize them and ask f
"Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs"
Small: I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there
"I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there"
Small: I cant understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few d
"I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars"
Small: Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars
"Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars"
Small: California is a great place to live if youre an orange
"California is a great place to live if you're an orange"
Small: A conference is a gathering of people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing c
"A conference is a gathering of people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done"
Small: A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glas
"A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known, and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized"
Small: Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great
"Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too great"
Small: Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns he should be drawn and quoted
"Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted"
Small: A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and dec
"A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and decide that nothing can be done"
Small: Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style it will just look ridiculous year after year
"Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just look ridiculous year after year"
Small: Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be do
"Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done"
Small: An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer
"An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer"