"When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity"
"When a man says money can do anything, that settles it: he hasn't got any"
"There is no sincerer love than the love of food"
"There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it"
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it"
"The possibilities are numerous once we decide to act and not react"
"The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post"
"The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can't find them, make them"
"The only way to avoid being miserable is not to have enough leisure to wonder whether you are happy or not"
"The only service a friend can really render is to keep up your courage by holding up to you a mirror in which you can see a noble image of yourself"
"The only secrets are the secrets that keep themselves"
"The natural term of the affection of the human animal for its offspring is six years"
"The moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, and become blind to the arguments against it"
"The minority is sometimes right; the majority always wrong"
"Self-sacrifice enables us to sacrifice other people without blushing"
"I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake"
"Youth is wasted on the young"
"It is the mark of a truly intelligent person to be moved by statistics"
"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience"
"Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few"
"Capitalism has destroyed our belief in any effective power but that of self interest backed by force"
"Why, except as a means of livelihood, a man should desire to act on the stage when he has the whole world to act in, is not clear to me"
"Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't!"
"What is virtue but the Trade Unionism of the married?"
"What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?"
"Virtue consists, not in abstaining from vice, but in not desiring it"
"Very few people can afford to be poor"
"Use your health, even to the point of wearing it out. That is what it is for. Spend all you have before you die; do not outlive yourself"
"Until the men of action clear out the talkers we who have social consciences are at the mercy of those who have none"
"Those who do not know how to live must make a merit of dying"
"There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it"
"There is nothing more dangerous than the conscience of a bigot"
"First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity"
"The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me"
"Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn"
"Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power"
"If women were particular about men's characters, they would never get married at all"
"Give a man health and a course to steer, and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not"
"Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own"
"There are no secrets better kept than the secrets everybody guesses"
"The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place"
"No man who is occupied in doing a very difficult thing, and doing it very well, ever loses his self-respect"
"She had lost the art of conversation but not, unfortunately, the power of speech"
"It's so hard to know what to do when one wishes earnestly to do right"
"You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old ones, grub"
"We should all be obliged to appear before a board every five years and justify our existence... on pain of liquidation"
"The heretic is always better dead. And mortal eyes cannot distinguish the saint from the heretic"
"Nothing is ever done in this world until men are prepared to kill one another if it is not done"
"Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history"
"He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career"
